Saturday was a good day for us. The boy’s soccer team won, UGA beat Florida for the second straight year, and it was cold enough to make chili. It was a perfect fall day in the Tisdale house. I was on the phone with one of my dearest friends when the day went downhill. Our 11 year-old cranky cat attempted suicide by German Shepherd. Yeah. Really. Isn’t that what every cat does? Wimsey saw our friend walking his pet and decided that as long as Seamus was restrained anyway, it would be a good time to attack him. Wimsey weighs in at about 11 pounds…Seamus? I’d guess 80 or so. There is good news, however. Seamus lives in a house with a 2 year-old boy and a 7 month old girl, so he has some experience with ignoring ridiculous challenges to his alpha supremacy. Wimsey was tenacious in his attack, so Seamus shook him around a bit after the third lunge, at which point our friend was able to separate them and take the victorious canine home. He called us and we went on a neighborhood cat-hunt for the foolish feline. We didn’t find him…he’s better at evasion than he is at frontal attacks, it seems. After about three hours, which we spent alternately praying for and cursing the ludicrous creature, he came home of his own accord. He has been a bit stiff and is REALLY pissed off, but the vet confirmed for us today that he escaped the ill-advised attempt on his own life with no serious injuries. Which is good, because in the meantime, the other cat, inappropriately named Angel, has had an “accident” on a bath mat, the dog barfed in his crate, and one of the children had a “stomach incident” on bedclothes that were washed just four days ago. It’s a good thing I love my washer and dryer…and an even better thing that I love my pets. The kiddo gets special kudos: she took care of herself because she didn’t want to wake us up. In fact, her father did find her awake, while he was dealing with the aforementioned dog: she was watching tv in the playroom, and he, very sympathetically, told her to go to bed. He totally missed the whole “I threw up a minute ago” thing. I had her all ready for school today before that particular gem came out…. Then we found the dirty blanket…then we felt sick too…. Nothing good happens at 3:30 in the morning. Though the child has been assured that her loving parents want to help her when she’s sick – even if it is in the middle of the night. Parenthood…it’s a glamorous calling!